Stories from the Sanq Kingdom
by majinski
Summary: [AU, R+1, 2+5, shounen ai, OOC] Duo has found his love, but will Relena find hers?
1. Chapter 1

Stories from das Sanq Kingdom Stories from the Sanq Kingdom   
by majinski 

Pairings: 2+5/5+2   
Warnings: shounen ai, AU, silliness, OOC 

Disclaimer: One day while sitting in a boring physics lesson, a girl named majinski was struck by an overwhelming urge to write a silly story involving the characters of Gundam Wing. Isn't it strange, how she was sitting in school instead of out having fun with the pile of money that she earned from creating GW? What's that? She didn't create GW? Oh right. That would explain it. 

  


++++++++ 

Once upon a time there was a magical prince in a magical land called the Sanq Kingdom. This prince's name was Duo. He was a happy prince, but one day he discovered a way to get out of his castle (that was so big that he had, in fact, never met his parents), which made him even happier. Once he made his way out the exit, he walked quickly through the grounds and to the shoe shop. 

Once Duo had gone in, he saw a ginger haired man with a mane tag on saying "My Name Is TREIZE". This alleged Treize was sipping wine from a delicate glass. The shop's floor was littered with roses and empty wine bottles. 

"Ah! It's the beautiful prince Duo! Oh I am now so happy!" Treize exclaimed. He than ran up to the startled and embarrassed (but undeniably beautiful) prince, got down on his knees and hugged Duo's legs. Treize sat attached to Duo for around fifteen minutes. Finally he pulled away and with tears in his eyes, he stood up gracefully and walked towards the boxes of shoes piled against the wall. Suddenly shoes came flying at Duo, so he ducked for cover and swiftly commando crawled backwards. As he did so, he bumped into a severely pretty boy with Asian features dressed in traditional white Chinese clothing. It was love at first sight, and after some meaningful gazing-into-each-other's-eyes, the two devised a getaway plan that consisted of saying their goodbyes to Treize and walking out of the door. They put the plan into action immediately, and Treize waved at them until they were out of sight. He then realised that they were gone. 

"Oh bother," he said. "They're gone. Might as well have some more wine." 

So he did. 

++++++++ 

Meanwhile... 

  


Duo and the Chinese boy (let's call him Wufei) were running through the forest. Suddenly, a giant turkey came waddling through the trees, and introduced himself as Samuel. 

"It's an honour to meet you, Samuel. My name is Chang Wufei, and this is Prince Duo," Wufei stated as he bowed formally. 

"So *that's* your name!" Duo exclaimed, momentarily remembering that he knew very little indeed about his fellow escapee, despite being in love with him. 

Wufei nodded slightly at Duo, who was staring into the Chinese boys 'obsidian orbs', bringing on another round of "When I Look Into Your Eyes I'm Lost". 

"Ahem." Samuel cleared his throat. When it didn't work, he tried again. 

"Hel-LO?! Some attention please! I am a giant turkey you know, I deserve at *least* a glance once in a while. And Lord knows it's not easy being a-a…FREAK like this!" He began sobbing as he spat out the last sentence. 

Duo was about to go over to Samuel and comfort him when a girl came flying down to them wearing an army suit, a tutu, ballet slippers, and frilly underwear on the outside. 

"Cuckoo!" she cried as she landed smoothly on the ground. 

Suddenly a headless dwarf and a girl with hands but no arms and a fish tail [1] ran through their small but impressive group that consisted of a flying female, an escaped prince, a Chinese boy that looked as if he had an attitude problem and some oversized live poultry. 

The girl, having just landed put away her imitation bat's wings (much to the disappointment of Duo who had been drooling at the sight of them, and the happiness of Wufei, who was starting to get jealous of the lust filled looks being directed at something other than him). 

"Hello! My name is Sally Po, and I have come to rid you of the evil that is Samuel, the Giant Turkey!" 

And thus Miss Po pulled out a French horn, which she handed to Samuel who promptly disappeared. 

"My work here is done," Sally said modestly, striking a superhero pose. 

"Huzzah!" cried Duo.   
"Huzzah!" cried Wufei.   
"Huzzah!" cried Treize, in a drunken manner from his shoe store.   
"Huzzah!" cried everyone else. 

And they all lived happily ever after. 

Fin 

[1]My friends Carinya and Mel requested to be in this story, so they are the headless dwarf and No Arms Girl respectively. 

Yes, I know it's silly, but please review anyway. 


	2. Chapter 2

Stories from the Sanq Kingdom (part 2)   
by majinski 

Pairing: R+1   
Warnings: AU, silliness, OOC, attempted humour 

Disclaimer: it's in the first part. 

  


++++++++ 

Once upon a time in a magical land called the Sanq Kingdom, there lived a prince and his groom [1] in a castle that was so big that they always lost each other, and only saw their respective husbands by following the directions given to them on walkie-talkies. Next to the Very Large Castle, there was a forest. In this forest lived a troupe of leprechauns. The Queen of the leprechauns was very beautiful and very short. Her name was Relena, and she wore clown shoes with fluoro pink laces in them which determined her as royalty. 

One day while Relena was out frolicking in the wilderness, she came across a fluoro pink frog. 

"Oh my!" she cried. "You match my shoelaces! We must be destined to be together. Come frog, and marry me!" 

In all her excitement, Relena had forgotten to ask the frog's name. So she did so. 

"What is your name, frog?" 

The frog looked at her blankly before replying - 

"Hn. Heero." 

"Oh right, well come on 'Hn Heero', we must get back so that we can be wed. Tally-ho!" 

"Off we go then!" Heero cried out in a very obviously fake British accent that made Relena Very Proud Indeed. When he realised what he'd just done, though, his eyes widened in horror (as much as a fluoro amphibian's eyes can widen - you'd be surprised actually). 

"Onna! What did you do to me?" 

"I, my fiancé, have done nothing to you," Relena drawled impatiently. "Come *on*, Tally-*ho*!" 

Heero shrugged, as he had nothing better to do than to marry the leprechaun queen. So the two raced along to the leprechaun church where they proceeded to get married. 

"Du may now kiss das bride," The German leprechaun priest stated. Upon realising the physical impracticality of his last sentence, he coughed and said, "groom, rather. Sorry." 

"OK!" yelled Relena. 

"Hn." Heero said disparagingly, as he let himself get kissed by the eager queen. 

She broke away from the frog, feeling a little disappointed that he hadn't turned into a handsome prince in robes of gold. But lo and behold! Suddenly he *did* transform, only instead of being a prince in robes of gold, he turned into a fifteen year old boy in a green tank top and very tight spandex shorts. There were also two mustard yellow coloured…things where his feet should have been. Everyone started staring at them. 

"They're shoes." Heero said, having followed Everyone's line of sight. 

"Oh." Everyone said, and a collective shudder ran through the crowd. 

Heero pulled out a gun from spandex space as he said "omae o korosu" to Everyone. Heero was obviously a little touchy on the subject of his shoes. 

They realised what was going on (clever chickens), and promptly shut up. 

Relena then grabbed her new playthi- erm, husband by the arm and ran out of the church throwing confetti over herself and Heero. 

"Huzzah!" cried Relena.   
"Huzzah!" cried Everyone.   
"Omae o kor-ugh - huzzah." Heero said in a monotone as Relena elbowed him none too gently in the ribs. 

And they all lived (relatively) happily ever after. 

Fin 

[1] Duo and Wuffers got married after Part 1. Spiffy, ne? 

Yes, I know it's silly, but please review anyway. 


End file.
